Saturday, March 21, 2009

Resident Evil 5: Racism and You!

So I'm not the biggest gamer. I have a system, but I don't play it much. When I do, I want an AMAZING FUCKING EXPERIENCE! So when I played (and beat) Resident Evil 5 in basically a day, I knew that I had been a part of an epic adventure. But the lingering feeling you get when you think about the game is like being an addict and you're tweaking in a sewer hoping to suck a dick for a crack rock. It's that fucking good!

It's the ultimate bitch slapping game. You run around with a friend, shooting bitches with some awesome guns, stomping on faces and beating the living shit out of them. If that's a typical vaca to Africa, sign me up! How many times do you get to Chuck Norris kick a bitch in the face then run up and slit their throats? I know a few bitches I'd like to do that to...
I guess it's important to address the controversy around whether it's a racist game or not, seeing as everyone is doing it (Peer Pressure!).  If you're the type of person who believes that it's racist, then  maybe you should look at yourself in the mirror and understand that you're a racist bastard muthafucker! The game takes place in Africa, who the fuck do you think I'd be shooting? White people? Shit... We kill white people all the time in games. Everyone has sand in their vaginas talking about this game. "Oh, you go to Africa and kill black people. How insensitive." Get the fuck out of here with that bullshit!

I'm a black man and not once while playing the game did I feel I needed to bitch about killing black people. Zombies are zombies... I wanted to stay the fuck alive! Ok, I will admit, playing as a white guy who shoots some African villagers and basically loots their areas for gold in order to upgrade my weapons to better kill more black people is a little questionable. But that's what the game is all about. Resident Evil 4 did the same fucking thing in Spain. THE SAME FUCKING THING! And no one said shit about that. No one gave a fuck. We play games where we go to South America, Asia, and Europe and kill all their locals. Hell, America is a a huge target for killing bitches but we never say a damn thing. But the minute we go to Africa, we're quick to pull the racist card. 

If you're so sick in the head that all you can concentrate on is the color of the skin, then you have the problem. Go to therapy. Go give some reparations. In fact, go make a black friend. Play some games with them. I guarantee you they won't have any qualms about killing bitches in video games. Go kill some white people. That's safe, and definitely not racist. 

Did I mention that your partner throughout the ENTIRE game is black. Not just black, African. Yes, your partner is on a mission to save her homeland by stopping the people who caused this.  If that means she has to kill a whole bunch of infected people who are trying to kill her and just happen to be African, so be it. Also, there are not only black people in the game. I've killed a whole bunch of whiteys and there are so many guys who look like Saddam Hussein. Who doesn't like fucking up Saddam? If you say "I don't", then you're also un-American. Get ready to be put on the "Do Not Fly" list.
You see that bitch right there (look up). He's about to fuck up my world and rip my face off. If you say you're just going to walk away and not blow his brains out, then you deserve to fucking die. Go kill yourself.

Did I mention that it's a kickass game?


  1. Vanessa LivingstonMarch 23, 2009 at 9:51 PM

    People have been talking about this shit EVERYDAY at my Gamestop... People love that racism card yo.

  2. It makes me want to slap some bitches. I think I should go to your Gamestop and show them what's what!

  3. lulz u well duh what u sayd its true actually and there is nothing questionable in this game if u think logical and not racist but its to late the stupid bitches by being racist brought alot of white, asian and arabian race zombie enamys so now in resident evil 5 there is only few blacks lulz thats africa or america i dont get it?